When Your Baby Won't Stop Crying: Colic, Causes & What Actually Helps
I remember standing in my kitchen at 11pm, baby screaming in my arms, completely convinced I was doing everything wrong.
I had fed her. Changed her. Rocked her. Walked up and down the hallway more times than I could count.
Nothing worked.
And this wasn't just one night. This was every night, for weeks.
My daughter had colic.
And if you're reading this in the middle of a crying episode right now, I want you to know: I see you. I've been exactly where you are. And I want to share everything that actually helped us get through it.
What Is Colic? (And Why Does It Happen?)
Colic is defined as frequent, prolonged, intense crying in an otherwise healthy baby.
The classic "rule of threes" is often used to describe it:
- Crying for more than 3 hours a day
- More than 3 days a week
- For more than 3 weeks
It usually starts around 2–3 weeks old, peaks around 6 weeks, and most babies turn a corner by 3–4 months.
I know. That feels like forever when you're in it.
The frustrating truth is that nobody fully knows what causes colic. But the most common theories include:
- An immature digestive system struggling to process milk
- Trapped gas and wind causing real discomfort
- An overstimulated or overwhelmed nervous system
- Sensitivity to something in breast milk or formula
For my daughter, I genuinely believe it was a combination of wind and overstimulation. Once I understood that, things slowly started to make more sense.
What Colic Actually Does to You as a Parent
I want to be honest about this part, because I don't think it gets talked about enough.
Colic doesn't just affect your baby. It affects you deeply.
I felt:
- Completely helpless — like no matter what I did, it wasn't enough
- Guilty — constantly wondering if I was causing it somehow
- Isolated — because nobody around me seemed to understand how bad it was
- Exhausted in a way I didn't know was possible
There were nights I put her down in her cot, walked to the bathroom, sat on the floor, and cried.
That is not bad parenting. That is survival.
If you're struggling emotionally during this time, please talk to your GP, midwife, or health visitor. You matter too.
What Actually Helped My Colicky Baby
I tried a lot of things. Some worked. Some didn't. Here's what genuinely made a difference for us.
🤍 White Noise — This Was a Game Changer
I cannot overstate how much white noise helped.
The womb is loud — a constant whooshing sound — and newborns find silence unsettling, not soothing.
We used our DreamNest™ Baby Sleep Sound Machine every single night, and the difference was noticeable almost immediately. It helped her settle faster and stay calmer during those difficult evening hours.
If you haven't tried white noise yet, start tonight.
🤍 Swaddling
A good swaddle was one of the first things that helped us.
When babies are colicky, they often thrash and startle themselves into more distress. Swaddling contains that movement and mimics the snug feeling of the womb.
I made sure to use a breathable organic cotton swaddle so she didn't overheat — because overheating always made things worse for us.
🤍 Wind and Tummy Relief
This was huge for my daughter. Once I realised how much trapped wind was contributing to her discomfort, I became obsessed with winding her properly.
Things that helped:
- Bicycle legs — gently cycling her legs while she lay on her back. I did this multiple times a day.
- Clockwise tummy massage — gentle circular strokes following the direction of digestion
- Burping mid-feed, not just at the end — this made a big difference
- Holding her upright for 20–30 minutes after every feed
- Tummy time while awake — the gentle pressure helped move trapped gas
I also tried gripe water and Infacol. Infacol in particular seemed to help — but always check with your pharmacist before using anything.
🤍 Movement and Rhythm
My daughter loved motion. Hated stillness.
What worked for us:
- Rocking her in my arms in a rhythmic, repetitive motion
- Walking with her in the pram — even at 10pm around the block
- Sitting on an exercise ball and gently bouncing — this saved me many evenings
- Short car rides when things were really bad
🤍 Skin-to-Skin and Closeness
Sometimes nothing "fixed" the crying. But holding her close — skin-to-skin — helped her feel safe enough to eventually calm down.
I stopped fighting the contact naps during this period. She needed closeness. I needed her to sleep. We both got what we needed.
🤍 Reducing Overstimulation
I noticed that her worst evenings always followed her busiest days.
Too many visitors. Too much noise. Too much passing around.
Once I started protecting her from overstimulation during the day, evenings became calmer.
In the evenings I would:
- Dim all the lights from around 6pm
- Turn off the TV
- Keep voices low and calm
- Reduce handling and stimulation
Our DreamNest™ GentleGlow Night Light was perfect for this — soft enough to keep the room calm, but bright enough to see during feeds and nappy changes without waking her fully.
🤍 Watching My Diet (I Was Breastfeeding)
I cut out caffeine and reduced dairy for a few weeks to see if it made a difference.
Honestly? I think cutting caffeine helped a little. The dairy change was harder to tell.
If you're breastfeeding and want to try this, speak to your health visitor first. It's not guaranteed to help, but for some babies it does.
When to See a Doctor
Most colic is not dangerous — but always trust your instincts. See your GP if:
- The cry sounds different, more high-pitched, or more urgent than usual
- Baby has a fever, vomiting, or diarrhoea alongside the crying
- Baby isn't gaining weight well
- You notice blood in the nappy
- Something just feels off
You know your baby better than anyone. If something doesn't feel right, get it checked.
How I Coped (Honestly)
I won't pretend I handled it gracefully.
But here's what helped me survive:
- My partner and I took turns so neither of us hit complete breaking point
- I let go of the idea that I had to fix every cry
- I put her down safely and walked away when I needed to
- I talked to other mums who had been through it — that helped more than anything
- I kept reminding myself: this is temporary
And it was. By around 14 weeks, she turned a corner. The evenings got quieter. The crying got shorter. We all started sleeping a little more.
Final Thoughts
If you have a colicky baby right now, I want you to hear this:
You are not doing anything wrong.
Your baby is not broken.
This is one of the hardest things early parenthood throws at you — and you are doing it.
Small things help. White noise. A good swaddle. A calm environment. A sound machine running through the night. Consistent winding. Lowering stimulation.
None of it is magic. But together, it adds up.
And one day — sooner than it feels right now — it gets better. 🤍
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